July
8, 2015
Dear
Ones,
The number of times I have sat down and begun
to type a letter to send out to each of you, such as some interesting story
attempting to explain the season I have been through during the recent months,
is really too many. Yet here I sit,
once again, trying in some way to break it down into bite size pieces of
information that will somehow make sense.
Maybe in some small way it is for me an ability to share in a greater
way the work that God is doing in my life during this unique active waiting
time. So I would like to share a few
glimpses of this teaching-learning time with you.
I have had the opportunity during this time
to sit and talk with many of you face to face, something I so greatly missed
while on the other side of the world. I
have been able to share through tears, laughter, long silent pauses to gather
my thoughts, and then tumbling words that just rolled out one after another in
a torrential flow, it just seems that no matter how hard I try there is not a
really easy way to share all that I have seen and heard and held. I have, and continue to seek out wise counsel
that points me ever back to my incredible God and His perfect plans
that never fail, His promises that ever sustain, and His Word that is
truth. A special thank you to each of
you that have sat and sipped coffee, shared lunch, and taken time to simply sit
for what has many times turned into hours of just talking and sharing, the time
with each of you has been a precious gift.
I still have many things that I hold very close and ponder in my heart,
things not ready to be shared yet. At
times, the possibilities and unknowns seem so overwhelming and I love the way
one sweet friend put it, “You just really wish God would send you a text!” There are days when one of those would be
really nice and then I have to remind myself that He has given me His whole
text! His Word is complete, lacking in
nothing, I simply need to dig deeper and listen with an open heart to all that
He is teaching me in this time of waiting.
In these days I have had the chance to
travel a little to visit friends and supporters. Some trips have been as close as a local shop,
or the farm for time in the fields, biscuit making and impromptu tea parties
that poured into my heart. Others visits
have been much further away in distance.
This has been incredibly encouraging and has given me the fun gift of
driving, which for me is a wonderful time of thinking and processing. I love driving and so long roads stretching
out for hours ahead are a special thing for me.
While
visiting a dear China friend who now lives in Washington DC, I had the chance
to spend the day alone visiting the Holocaust Museum, which sounds a bit
strange, but for me it was a reminder of the war that I have seen fought every
day for the lives of little children. I
stood for the longest time reading and looking at the pictures in the display
showing the “hospitals” for imperfect children who were placed there to be
disposed of through various means, and these were not Jewish children they were
German children who did not “meet the standard of the new culture.” I thought of buildings full of children,
halls lined with cots, rooms down dark hallways, and societies that have thrown
away what God calls valuable, the very ones that He says are made in His
image. I cried as I stood in a room
surrounded by black walls filled with names and thought of a Big House with its
roof top walls filled with names… all these lives lost in wars.
I have spent time relearning what it is like
to shop where I can read all the labels, to enter a store and not be
overwhelmed by the sheer amount of things available on the shelf. I am remembering what it is to drive in some
sort of orderly fashion where red and green lights are not simply pretty
decorations and sidewalks are not an extra lane used for passing when needed.
I was able to spend time visiting my dear
friend Sarah who is in the States right now from India. She and her family opened their home and
hearts to me and little Jeremiah while we were in India. I was once again able to sit down with her,
to introduce her to my sister, Melissa, and to have a chance to talk heart to
heart. This friend, who knows many of the little details of God’s grace in
placing her in my life at a crucial crossroad where she became a faithful
shoulder to lean on in the hard. What an
incredible grace gift.
I have in these past months been given the
amazing opportunity to spend time with and serve my family in ways that I have
not been able to in years. I have been
given the simple joy of daily washing dishes, doing laundry, cleaning, cooking,
preparing lunches for work and school and adding an extra set of hands to the
various projects that are being done. It
is amazing to me the vast amount of deep thinking and prayer that can be done
while my hands are busy doing the routine and that I can perform with almost
rote memory. During this time, I have
been given the beautiful gift of getting to know my two little sisters, I have
always been the sister who lived in China, who visited at Christmas, and talked
on Skype. Now I have the privilege of
hearing about school lessons, and attending field days, I have the chance to
tuck notes in lunch boxes, and spend time with them. I get to go with them on adventures, have tea
parties, play Legos, dress baby dolls, and read stories. I get to see kindergarten graduation and swim
lessons, and listen with smiles to piano lesson renditions of songs. I have the joy of hearing them tell the
stories of Jesus and His love for them and all about their love for Him. I have loved being able to go with them on
their first camping trip, tracheostomies do not mix well with dirt and water so
finally having the ability to go camping is a huge event in our family. I watched as two wiggly little girls learned
to fish the same way their older sisters did.
I watched as my daddy patiently showed them how to cast, untangled
lines, and then finally baited hooks and sent the lines flying out into the
water. Yes, we did actually cook and
eat what they caught!
I have spent time reading books that cause me
to think, to ponder, to listen closely to what God is teaching me through the
pages and then take it all back to the truth of His Word once again.
I had the humbling experience of being able
to attend a very special Show Hope reunion with my family that was hosted by
Steven Curtis and Mary Beth Chapman. We
went to Nashville and joined many other families, all with children who had
been adopted from the Care Units that I have been working in and I cannot even
begin to describe to you the beauty of that time for me. I was able to see children that I have loved,
cared for, held, and prayed over, now in the arms of loving forever families. It was like a tiny glimpse of Heaven when God
will call home all of His adopted ones to their forever home, and His forever
family reunion. I heard my name being
called by little voices. I felt arms
around my legs and my neck.
I saw
mothers’ and fathers’ tears through my own as I felt an overwhelming sense of
God’s abundant grace. This incredible
gift of seeing so many little faces and wiggling bodies filled with life and
laughter—I have been most richly blessed.
Nashville trips have also brought special
time for catching up with dear friends, sharing fellowship together,
introducing family to people that I have grown to love over the course of my
years in China and who have been such an incredible source of friendship and
encouragement to me.
These are just a few glimpses of the days
that are being written during this season of my journey, and each moment brings
new opportunity to share with various ones the amazing love that God has for
orphans and how He provides and cares not only for them but for those who
follow His commands to care for them. I
am amazed at every turn at how He teaches me more of Himself and His heart for
the lost through the care of the fatherless.
I have had the chance to share with some of you in a very close personal
setting. I wish there was a way I could
sit down with a cup of coffee or a peanut butter blitz shake with each one of
you and share more. I am actually very
excited that I will be going with my sister, Melissa, and a small team from
AFCI (Ambassadors For Christ International) to the Ukraine, July 14-26, to help
with a weeklong English/Bible camp for teens.
I am looking forward to having the chance to share with those young
people God’s heart for them, His heart for the lost, and His longing to be
their Father. What a joy to know that
God uses the experiences in our lives on His calendar to orchestrate
opportunities to share in ways that I could never imagine. I look forward to sharing with you how God
uses and leads during this time. And I
am praying that there will be even more opportunities in the time ahead to
spend time telling you of all that God is doing and has done as I cease
striving and prayerfully wait on Him and His direction for the next step in my
journey.
Only
by His Grace,
Mariah