Doll Houses and "Why?"

October 11, 2010

Dear Ones,

I just love watching children play. In playing I have the opportunity to get a glimpse into their world with a perspective that often times has me sit back in awe at the way God has created their thought processes to teach me so much. It is delightful to see their little minds in action and I love to encourage them in that. Recently I have found myself having the opportunity to play and to be more specific to play house. While I was home for those few short hours in September I was able to play with the doll house that Jing Ni received for her Birthday, she and Janessa and I had a delightful time, moving the Calico Critters about, turning tiny lights on and off, and making everyone talk. There is nothing like watching a 22month old with a tracheostomy trying to make her little kitten doll talk using sign language! After this experience you can only imagine my delight when a few days after I arrived back in my China home a package from a friend arrived with a Fisher Price Little People doll house- Jaelynn was thrilled and it has been her constant companion and entertainment since. I began watching one morning as she carefully set up her little home and was using making her little people talk and realized that her ayis were using this tool to teach her about life in a real home…wow.

She knew who the grandma and grandpa were, where the dog belonged, and how the kitchen was supposed to be set up. Though she has never heard someone knock on a door she was having her little person knock and then Grandma would answer the door and ask, “Who is it?” She had the little “mama” cooking in the kitchen and “baba” would go to work. This little girl who has never seen a “normal” family in action was putting into play the things she had picked up from the world around her. A few moments later she looked up at me, held out her hand with the baby and stated, “Look, she is just like me.” I glanced at the ayi next to me and asked her if I understood and she said, “Yes.” I then asked Jaelynn why the baby was just like her and she told me, “She has a tumor just like mine.” I then had to get down on the floor with her and examine the baby. For any of you who have ever had the opportunity to play with “Little People” you know that they are designed with round bases that fit into their furniture and accessories, well the baby is fitted into one of these round base shapes but in order to not make her look funny she is in a sort of basket that has some accessories in it. One of those accessories is a ball that is on the blanket next to her but to my little 4 year olds mind that was a tumor that looked just like the one she has on her back- “the baby was just like her.” She looked around the room and told me that there wasn’t a baby just like her sister with a tube in her nose, and I told her that she was right there were none with tubes in their noses. She then asked “Why not?” My language skills were at an end, I smiled and simply said, “I don’t know why.”

My ayis giggled and later I noticed that one of the dolls had an ink marker line from her nose- I think they were fixing the problem. I thought about it the whole rest of the day the fact that so often here in our special home we get caught up in taking care of the medical needs of our little ones, we focus completely on those and miss the moments that are just like every other child, the “Why?” moments. To my little ones it does not matter how well I care for their medical needs, how well I can give injections, start IV’s, put in a tube, or calculate the medications that they need- all they care about is who gets into my arms first, who gets kisses, who has a story read, or a doll played with, who gets to fall asleep as I rock and sing to them, and how I answer their “Whys?” In short they want to be loved and to know that although they are uniquely special they are “just like me” made in the image of God. I want to have the faith of a child that simply trusts my Father and though my language skills may fail at times in being able to understand and answer the “Why,” it will never fall short in answering the “Who.”

Loving each of you,

Mariah